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Terrible 3's??

post #1 of 16
Thread Starter 
DS just turned 3 in late October, and I cannot BELIEVE the change in his behavior over the last 2 weeks. He has become defiant, beliegerant, and mouthy. His favorite words are "No", "Uh-uh", and "I don't want to". He also now points his finger at me when he says "NO!" and has reached out to hit me when he gets really upset. What happened to my sweet little angel who always listened? His two's were a PIECE OF CAKE compared to his three's so far. Is this normal? My older son who is now 4 1/2 is autistic, so I never experienced any of this defiance with him (although he is starting to show a little defiance here and there these days). It seems like nothing works with discipline. Taking toys away gets him upset, but doesn't change his behavior. I HATE spanking, but I have spanked his bottom a few times (not hard, but enough to leave a little sting) and that seems to make him stop the behavior. He absolutely refused to get in his bed for a nap this afternoon - kept yelling "NO" at me - I picked up all his Disney Cars and took them out of his room and put them up high, and it didn't make any difference. He continued to yell "NO" at me, until I finally spanked his bottom (twice) and then he finally got in bed. I feel like spanking should be used as a LAST, LAST resort, but man, oh, man - this kid is STUBBORN!!
post #2 of 16
I call them the trysome three's. Mine were always trying my patience, and trying to see what they could get away with. They are at the age where they want to see if they can push the limits. The best advice I can give is be consistent. And it is really hard, but this phase will pass. I have a very stubborn one too. But as he gets older, he is 5 now, it really is getting better, and more calm!
post #3 of 16
This won't help, but I went through the same thing with my older two....I remember I kept saying to myself "terrible twos??? three's are much worse". It does get better, and I agree with brandk916...stay consistent. Don't give in. they have to see how much they can get away with.
post #4 of 16
Yep, the threes are the worst. I am praying that my grandson is the exception because he can be so rotten at two that I don't think the three's could possibly be worse.... All of my children were (are for my youngest) their most challenging at age 3! All I can say is hang in there!! This too shall pass!
post #5 of 16
I always called it the terroristic 3's (this was over 7 years ago- so back then it did not seem so bad)- it was like someone took over my child's body! I am going through this with my littlest right now- like someone else said- this to shall pass. I have to say i really liked the age of 4- but when your kid goes off to school, they totally change then (well in my case, don't know about anyone else!).
post #6 of 16
My DD turned 3 in August and I can completely relate (the terrible 2's was pretty much nonexistant). "I don't want to" and "no" are her favorite words. All the discipline tactics I would use with her in the past (timeout, taking toys away) don't work. And most recently, she's been a nightmare to put down for a nap (and she does still need her nap, otherwise she's worse in the evenning) and to bed. And we've had the same bedtime routine since she was a baby. She has gone into full scale tantrums where she's screaming and crying and falling to the floor kicking her legs around. Combine that all with regressing with the potty training where she doesn't even try to go to the potty. And I know it doesn't help that we have a new baby in the house. She loves her baby brother and has never done or said anything against him, and has always been affection towards him.

I just keep trying to be patient with her and praying that it will all pass soon. But I know some of you have mentioned that the 4's can be worse.
post #7 of 16
My youngest dd just turned 3 in August too. Let me tell you compared to the 2's, 3's has been very challenging. She too has become loud and demanding...especially with her siblings...everything is mine, mine, mine....no,no,no. I have her potty trained so that is a bonus but boy she has a temper...especially if anyone tells her no. I am surprised I still have windows in my house and car!
I have popped he on the bottom a few time...especially if she does sometime she know id wrong...like drawing on the walls/leather car seats/self with markers like she did today.
Sometime I ignore the tantrums....but sometime I have to place her in a time out...it depends on what is going on at the time. The good thing is she gets over it fast....not like her brother who was the nightmare of the three. He was hard from 6 months until just recently...he has gotton a little better...he will be 7 next week.
My older daughter seemed to go throught the terrible three and then 4 through10 was a breeze....now she is going through the terrible tweens and shortly to be a teenager, ugh!
post #8 of 16
I'm fairly new here, but I felt compelled to add to this post. My daughter turned 3 in August. I think I'm going to lose my mind LOL! She was the sweetest little thing until a couple of months ago. I had to carry her out of 3 stores in one week because she was throwing tantrums. She hasn't EVER done that before. She's definitely trying my patience, but I've had to get really, really strict. She gets one warning and then an immediate consequence, but sometimes even that doesn't work. Lately I've been using Santa Claus as leverage. I don't know what I'll do after Christmas LOL!

Michelle
post #9 of 16
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by michellect View Post

She's definitely trying my patience, but I've had to get really, really strict. She gets one warning and then an immediate consequence, but sometimes even that doesn't work. Lately I've been using Santa Claus as leverage. I don't know what I'll do after Christmas LOL!

This is exactly what we are going through. The "Santa Claus" threat hasn't been working so well, though. I'm thinking if we take him to see Santa at the mall, and he actually speaks to him, then maybe it will be more effective. Who knows? I am thinking of trying out some sort of behavior/reward chart, but I have to figure out how I am going to do that.
post #10 of 16
My dd will be 4 in January and I am so sick of her sassy attitude. She thinks she can tell us what to do but that isn't going to fly. I usually take her t.v. viewing away and that works or if it's really bad she gets a time out. Good luck, just know we are all with you!
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