Do you hide money from your spouse or S/o? - Page 4

I DO hide money from DH. he has a little problem budgeting and paying bills, and i have to take care of all that (i have been working very hard on including him in it every month and having him help me balance the check book but he just never had to do it before in his life so he has trouble with it)

we have a savings account for our daughter that his name is not on but he knows exactly how much is in there.

if its hidden in our joint savings account does that qualify as "hidden"?

he pretty much has no idea how much money we have or how much we need for bills (even though i'm working on teaching him) so he just asks "do we have money for ice cream?" or groceries... or gas... or pizza and i just say NO because we have some substantial credit card debt that is hanging over our heads and any extra dime we have should really go to that as long as we arent starving and we can still make it to work.

if he balanced the checkbook by himself and read the bills he would know exactly where all our money is

No I do not keep any money from my husband. He is the one who insisted on me having a savings account just in my name with money in it in case something happens to him. That way I would access to some money to tide me over till the estate is done. I said that is a good idea. I keep 20 or 30 dollars in my wallet but hiding no I do not. To me that is a trust issue. If you have no trust then there is no marriage. Oh well I will climb off my soap box now LOLOL

I hide money but he knows I am hiding money. This is just my safety plan. I am keeping money for the day dh moves out. I have no income and he "forgets" to give me money or even tell me how much money we have, pay bills that are in my name...the list goes on.

I do agree with everyone that said without trust there is no marriage. There is no trust in my marriage and that is why I am saving money for my own emergencies and for the day that dh moves out for good.

The only time I hide money is if I take cash out for something like the kids swimming lessons or whatever. If dh happens to see I have cash, he will "borrow" it for drinks or snacks at the convenience store.

Well sure, you need trust in a marriage. But people let you down because people are not perfect. Your spouse, friends, job, the economy, your bank accounts, etc., will always let you down. Many women have trusted that their husbands wouldn't cheat, wouldn't leave them, etc., and then it happened. I will only put my full trust in God, because He will never let me down.

That said, for years I did hide money from my s/o. I was (still am) a SAHM, and he was always saying he was going to leave me & the kids and not pay support, so you can bet I put money away. Then God turned our lives around, and we are now happily married. And I still have my own bank accounts, LOL. We still have our joint checking account, but I have my own checking account, savings account, brokerage account, Certificate of Deposit, and only my name on the kids' accounts. Not all at the same bank either - that is never wise for many reasons.

Now, while my money may not be "hidden" anymore, it is still in my name. That is OK with him as he's not good with money. It works for us, and I've used some of the CD money to pay bills when we got hit with some big ones. DH doesn't know how much money there is spread out b/t all the accounts, and he's fine with that. He knows that if there is a bill to be paid, that it will be paid. He makes the money - I manage the money.

Back to the magazine article - that bank did a big no-no when they told the husband about the wife's account. I hope with today's interest rates that it wasn't all in a savings account, LOL. It could have been her retirement account, IRA, or inheritance, but we don't know as we didn't read the article.