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SAHMs: Do you feel lonely?

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 

If you mainly stay at home during the day with your kids, do you ever get lonely?  How do you meet new friends?  

post #2 of 14
I prefer to be alone. Not that I don't want or have friends, I have a small group of friends that I trust implicitly, but we're scattered around the US. It's just that at home- I'm content to be alone, or hang out with hubby. I like puttering in the garden or reading a book.
post #3 of 14
I have tried being a sahm and I don't like it at all. I need adult interaction. I was quite lonely when I stayed at home.
post #4 of 14
I did feel a bit lonely when my kids were younger and I thanked goodness for MommySavers! Once they hit pre school I started making friends with other moms and that helped! Then once they hit elementary I started being able to volunteer and that was a nice outlet!, plus meeting even more moms! Once BoTh my kids were in school, I started taking time for ME,like go to lunch on what my best friend and I called free Fridays and would lunch. I also made a friend I met through my oldest sons friend, her and I started making the YMCA a daily ritual and sometimes afterwards we grocery shop or just shop lol. AND last week I ended my SAHM status with a part time job. SO basically I think it has gone through its stages. I also am still very thankful for MommySavers as I have made a few really good friends!
post #5 of 14

I was HORRIBLY lonely for about 6 years. Then we moved and I started to make new friends within the new school! I still get lonely but things are getting better with each passing year. Next year ALL 5 kids will be in school so I will have more time for me!! I am thankful for Mommysavers too!

post #6 of 14

I got pretty lonely for a while but luckily I have friends that are on weird work schedules so we would skype talk occasionally or one would come over to hang out. I only stayed home the first year so I don't know how I would have done this time, I guess I will find out over the summer when I am home again.

post #7 of 14

I don't usually get lonely.  We are busy enough that on days we just stay home, I relax and enjoy it.  I've made friends at church and at the library story time.  I haven't had a need to, but I know I could also make friends with other preschool moms, or moms at the museum or aquarium.   At any of those places, I just strike up a conversation if I want to talk to someone.  "Your daughter's hairbows are so cute, did you make them?" or something inane like that, lol.  The last time I made a friend, her son was looking at dinosaur books at the library, so I told her about M's interest in dinosaurs and we talked going to the museum together.

post #8 of 14

I was VERY lonely from the time DS first came home until a few months ago.  They are now old enough that I don't feel "trapped" at home, and I can get out and socialize...even if it is just with a cashier or retail clerk.  LOL  The park, museum, etc. are much more fun with two walkers, and not one walker and one crawler wiggling out of your arms.

 

It was hard there for a while, though.

post #9 of 14

I never felt lonely.  I always made sure that I had one or two things going on with another mom that week to not only keep the kids occupied but for my own sanity.  When they were in school all day, I got bored.  That's one of the reasons why I went back to work.

post #10 of 14

Sometimes, especially since the move. Apparently I am the only woman on the face of the planet with a child in school and no children at home. I don't work. I am alone from the time DD walks out of the house for the bus at 6:30am until she returns at 2:30pm. Since she is older there is no opportunity to hang out with other moms like I did when I was taking her to activities like gymnastics or swim lessons. The school discourages parent volunteers in the classroom when the kids are this age.

 

Trust me, cleaning a 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom apartment doesn't take that much time. Laundry is a one day activity. I walk the dog daily, do a little grocery shopping, cook dinner and a chore like pay bills (lately, working on the taxes, too) but none of that is what I'd call a full-time job. I am definitely NOT busy and I hate it. I looked into volunteer activities and I came up with nothing (which surprised me). Maybe when we settle in the town where we want to live that will change. Plus it looks like I'll be busy with remodeling or building a house at that point. I used to do a few merchandising jobs which was fine except the company recently refused to pay me for a job I did so I'm backing off there. I'd explore the area more but I'm trying to conserve gas. I looked into classes or even a lecture series but there is almost NOTHING during the day. Everything starts in the late afternoon or evening. Since I have to be home by 2:30 for DD I'm pretty much aced out of even taking a yoga class. I even looked into joining a gym so I could take a fitness class there but none of the classes were during the day. Once hubby comes home - which can be anywhere from 4pm to 6pm (or later if he works overtime), I want to BE with him, not running off to a class. Besides, we go to bed at 8pm (get up at 4:30am) so a class that gets out at 9pm is late for me.

 

I'm a person who is fine with BEING alone - I actually prefer it - but it has been frustrating trying to get to know people because I don't work and I don't hang out with other moms through DD. I'm still in transition and it is getting old.

 

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