Parents that never married, splitting up

To each their own. 

 

One family I know has had three kids together. They have lived together and act married, telling some that they are. Technically he is still married to first first wife and they never divorced. Talk about dysfunction. (There is so much more that adds to their dysfunction not just their living arrangement)

Yeah I know some like that. I never got it. My youngest dd lives with her boyfriend they been together 3 years, have an 8 month old. I don't get it at all, why not get married?

Laws actually cover these situations to a point. Many homosexual couples have the same problem - living together for a long time, even having children together, then something happens - either they split up or one dies or gets very sick. Child support could still be awarded. There can still be a court ordered splitting of assets. It is more complicated, but do-able.

I don't know anyone personally like that. Almost all the couples we know are married and still with their original spouse who is the father of the children even. I've talked before about how I live in the land of intact families and non pregnant teens. I'm not sure what they put in the water here. I do think it's odd, but then I made sure I got married before I ever had kids.

A huge pet peeve of mine. If you are married, than you are married. If you are living together and not married, fine, but don't tell people you are married. What I see is that these people are often somehow taking of the welfare system.

DH's sister was living with her boyfriend, legally changed her name to match his and even wore an expensive wedding ring but they weren't married because she owed the state so much money in back child support and they would attach her income ifmthey knew she had any. Ofmcourse when she and the b/f split up, too all of her friends that didn't know they weren't really married on FB, she would talk about how hard their "divorce" was. The split up might have been hardmbut there never was a divorce, they weren't married.

DH's brother and his g/f are the same thing. She is a stay-home-mom that supports herself on her child's disability check. The child was born very early. She required a ton of medical care, in the beginning, and, after she survived, she was put on disability for four years, I think, which her parents live on. The father is also on disability, depression, and if they were married, the mom would not actually get as much money because their incomes would be combined. But they still consider themselves married and she took his name.

I could care less. I know people who aren't married who have much better relationships than people who are, and vice versa. I don't think being married has any bearing whatsoever on how two people function together. DH introduced me as his wife and referred to me as his wife for ages before we were married. When we did get married it surprised a few people because they thought we already were haha

Yes I know someone who refers to her live in boyfriend of 6 years as her husband (her son is not from him)  It is purely financial, he makes lots of $$, and she still gets goverment $$ because she is a 'single mom'.  Anyway, she wonders why I tell her it's not in the budget  for some things, well she had this guy handing her $$, she has no house payment (his house) her kids tuition is getting half paid for by the government.  I'm glad it's not me but it ticks me off.  She was just saying how half her tuition is paid for by the govt.  Thanks, that would be nice.

See, that does bother me. She's lying just to manipulate income and funds in her favor. And we pay for it...yaaay

Yup.