responsibility

This has been a bad weekend for kid responsibility! I got to deal with my girlfriends 10 and 11 yr old as well as my own 3 this weekend. The last time L and M were here they lost their cell phone. Their good luck I found it 2 days later out in the yard just as it was starting to storm. So they get it back on Fri. Within 4 hours I find it as it almost falls into the toilet. @@ I took it and gave it back to mom. She was super stressed from her divorce stuff that she absentmindedly gave it back. By noon the next morning it was lost once again at my house. I was on these girls, especially M, to keep their things together and put up away from DS4 and DD3. M is firmly standing by her story that DD3 took it and hid it. They have no responsibility in letting a 3 yr old run off with their phone. When it was time for them to leave Ms slap bracelets were missing. Of course they were. DD3 and DS4 played with them all day and DH and I were picking them up and returning htem to M all day. Again, M has no responsibility in them missing. This morning I get a call at church from mom. M has lost $14 in my house and is quite upset. Again, DD3 must have taken it out of Ms purse. Gee, my 3yr old sure was busy! L, M and DD11 are all sure they saw DD3 with these items throughout the day and taking the items away was not their responsibility. M has called me twice today crying about the money(couldn't care less the phone is missing) and directing me where to look for it while getting mad at DD3. Further, last night I went to get a ho ho from a brand new unopened box DH bought me as a treat and the entire box was gone! Guess who ate all 12 of them? Yup, you guessed it, DD3. She climbed up and got them off of hte top of the cabinet, opened the box and opened allthe individual packages and nobody saw her except with 1. M is the one who saw her of course. I am ready to flip the heck out on these big kids! I am not looking for the missing money, phone or bracelets. If I do happen to find them I am holdign on to them. THis is blooming ridiculouse!!!!!!!!!!!

OH, I was generally here. We have 10 rooms plus a garage plus the outside. I had a total of 5 kids ages 3 to 11 plus 3 animals plus DH plus the girls mom for part. We were split into different rooms cleaning. DH and the little kids and I did leave for an hour to go pick up the pool. The 3 big kids were left home alone, something we have done many times. M is a master sneaker when it comes to food. She has binging issues. We don't generally have a problem with her here though. Found the money last night. It was in the bottom of a garbage can with Ms wet clothes on top of it. Confused about the garbage can though.

I hear ya. I understand that DD3 may have been the one to officially "lose" the cell phone. I can believe she walked off with it. However, I still blame the older kids for watching and letting her do it. It was their phone,their responsibility. I am so over the big kids blaming the little ones for stuff like that. At this point L and Ms mom is letting it all go. So am I as far as their lost items. Not my responsibility. My own DD11 isn't off the hook and she knows it for the hohos. I can conceed that maybe she didn't eat any but she sure as heck knows something. She admits to seeing the little kids with one each (which someone had to get for them! Even if they stood on the counter they wouldn't be able to reach!) but yet knows nothing. Paying for that now. It will come back around. I am sure she will ask to go to the park with her friend today and my answer will be no. I don't know if I can trust her right now. She will be mad but it is the truth. When she asks for money to walk to McDs the answer will be no. I don't know if I can trust her to do that responsibly plus my extra money will be to replace the hohos (which I don't really care about. That isnt' the point). If they had fessed up we would be bck to life as normal. Next time L and M come over sweets/treats will be removed from teh kitchen. About 2 yrs ago M had filled her backpack, suitcase and pockets of clothes with snacks she was takng from our house. We discovered it because her folks had my DH do a full scale shakedown of her stuff when we picked her up for the weekend because of something else. DH also did a shakedown before she left with her folks there. Found everything and boy, were we all in shock! Good thing for this kid that we love L and M and are willing to help instead of turn our backs.

DD11 has only lost hers once. I mean lost to the point of replacing it with an older phone. That was almost 2 yrs ago. She has misplaced it on occassion but it is always found quickly without major looking. M has lost theirs more times than I can count. When it disappears she is always the last one to have used it. IF she were my child she wouldn't be allowed to have it. L is more responsible. I would let her have it.