Stay-at-home mommy burn out - Page 3

DD knows, even when I worked part-time. For a while I worked the census and could arrange my hours around her school schedule which meant she never had to know when I wasn't home. She still flipped out. There is something that happens where she starts to think "Mom can't come to the school if I need her" and she just loses it.

Funny but she was just asking me yesterday if I was planning on getting a part-time job. How does she do that? I was talking to hubby about the possibility of getting a part-time job while DD was off swimming with a friend. There is no way she could have heard us! Anyway, her friend's mom works all the time which has made for a rather boring summer for her. I wonder if seeing the friend has raised DD's anxiety about me working. When she was asking me about working, it sounded like she was trying to talk herself into believing it would be a good idea.

Still, I hope volunteering - especially at the school - will help fill a hole. Actually, the only part-time job that really worked out was when I did recess duty but DD just thought I was coming to see her at school everyday.

BTW, the unemployment rate in our county just rose to 9.4% - not horrible for MS, but not terrific either.

You make good points ... I guess in her head, my volunteering is optional but my working is abandoning her. This is a kid who is forever fixated on what I'm doing when she is at school. When she went to preschool she hated that I'd go shopping without her - like I was denying her the privilege or something. She is hyper-vigilant that I don't play with her pet rabbit when she is gone because she doesn't want the rabbit liking me more than her. When she was a preschooler, I couldn't even lie on the couch and close my eyes (NOT fall asleep - just close my eyes) without her freaking out.

And I have to admit, volunteering takes up WAY less time than working part-time. A volunteer "job" is an hour or two, once or twice a week (except at the school where I could do more than one thing). Plus she has lightened up over the years. I can now go shopping for items other than groceries without her making a comment.

As for leaving her alone, that is a completely separate issue. For her, that is her being "grown up" and her doing her own thing. She is fine with her doing her own thing. She just gets anxious when I do my own thing.