Hey all - I haven't posted in this board yet, but really enjoy lurking and browsing all your advice!
Here's my situation:
My DS is currently being taken care of by my parents. I love my parents and my son adores them - they have a great time and my mom spoils him rotten. My parents have been watching DS since he was about 4mo old - until 6mo old then again when he was 9mo old until 18mo old (I'm a teacher - that's why there's a gap). I have some issues with my mom because she doesn't do what I ask her to do with my LO - i.e. what to feed him, what rules to reinforce, what activities to do with him...etc. For example, if I tell my mom "we are working on no hitting - please do XYZ if he does hit" she will completely ignore me and allow him (and laugh) when he hits other people or their dog and it's really frustrating. I'm recently finding out that my mom has been lying to me about what she feeds DS - i avoid (our home avoids) 'lots of preservatives and anything super processed - i prefer homemade and whole foods ALL THE TIME- i pack DS lunch and my mom wouldn't feed it to him...etc. Come to find out she's been feeding him Burger King and other foods that are on my no-no list...and vegetables? it's not even in my parents vocabulary! But on the other hand - they give DS 'lots of hugs, kisses and cuddles and are able to give him the one-on-one attention. Not to mention, I feel secure that he's not being hurt, neglected...etc in a daycare.
My DH and I are PO'd to say the least but at the same time don't know if it's enough for us to put him in daycare and cough up that expense. We currently pay my parents (about half of what a daycare would charge) and although it would help us out financially to keep him with my parents and security that he's in loving arms i'm concerned about the lack of structure, boundaries, rules...etc that will be lacking from their care...not to mention the lack of educational activities my parents basically refuse to do with him.
DH and I found a daycare that we like- we've visited all the daycares in the area and we only found one that we'd be OK with. WWYD? Suck it up until LO is 2.5 to find a nursery school and leave him with grandparents for another 6months (January - June) OR enroll him in a daycare part-time 3full days a week? or full time 5 full days a week?
Financially, we'd be really tight (wouldn't be able to save much of anything) but we could make payments.