I am sorry for your husband's job loss and all the other stress in your life right now. If I missed that news in an earlier thread, I apologize. You don't deserve this and I am praying for your family.
Thank you. I hadn't announced it on here. I wasn't sure I was quite ready to deal with everyone's opinions on it yet. LOLBut I did on facebook. We are both looking for jobs and send out several applications/resumes each day with no replies yet. And today dh found out that a friend of his applied for a job that he did, and the other guy got hired and dh never got a phone call.
While I agree with you in theory, this won't work. Number 1, these girls are old enough to be responsible for themselves. If this were school and they were told do not forget your white t shirt or you fail, they would NOT forget thier white tshirt! its the same thing, have your tshirt or sit out because you are not in proper uniform.
And number 2, we don't give THAT much info. There is alot now because its still the beginning of the season, and alot that we need to get done, to get ready for games, and competitions. If we called the parents to a meeting after every practice, trust me that would get old quick. And there are alot of kids that don't even have parents pick them up, I have one girl that I drive home every night myself, and there are several others that carpool whenever possible. And for every notice we send home, we always put 'please contact us anytime with questions!' And I do get phone calls pretty regular from parents that may be confused on something.
Though, you DO have a point, we might need to call a parent meeting just to have everyone on the same page, esp when we start our indoor practices for comp.
Your girls are going to be as organized as you are. What I meant by a meet what sorta like a registration meeting where the parent learn the RULES like you will recive a letter/email weekly, biu weekly, monthly what ever you decide on. So they know what to expect and look for. I feel there is a serious lack of communication with the parents. IMHO. My daughter takes dance I pay for it and EXPECT the owner/teacher to communicat things to me not though my daughter. I am an involved parent. I get EVERY dance season something that says Ballet class. Required pony tail, leotard, tights, ballet shoes, Dance recital $ of costume.... If you need an example I can put something together to show you want I mean. I did cheer for 5years.
Your girls are going to be as organized as you are. What I meant by a meet what sorta like a registration meeting where the parent learn the RULES like you will recive a letter/email weekly, biu weekly, monthly what ever you decide on. So they know what to expect and look for. I feel there is a serious lack of communication with the parents. IMHO. My daughter takes dance I pay for it and EXPECT the owner/teacher to communicat things to me not though my daughter. I am an involved parent. I get EVERY dance season something that says Ballet class. Required pony tail, leotard, tights, ballet shoes, Dance recital $ of costume.... If you need an example I can put something together to show you want I mean. I did cheer for 5years.
We already had the parent meeting at the first practice. They were told whats expected, how to dress, no jewlrey (girls still come in every day with earrings on) no makeup, (girls still keep coming in with fake tatoos). They were told about fundraising. They were told about concession stand. They were told were to park, (yet people STILL park where its supposed to be coaches only) They were told about the BC and all that stuff, we gave them a deadline of Aug 2 and as of Aug 20, I'm STILL after parents to get them to me. I'm very organized, and I do the best I can, but there will always be people that will drag thier feed and wait until the last second or until its almost 2 late to get me the right stuff I need. And like I said, these girls are 10. If at 10, you can't remember to give your waiting parent the paper I give them, OR the parent doesn't take the time to READ the paper I send home, that is NOT my problem. You deal with consequences.
I have 24 girls on my team. Out of 24 girls, I had 2 that didn't wear the white tshirt. SO I thought I did a good job conveying that fact that they needed one, and 22 parents took the time to read that little paper, and made sure thier daughters had white tshirts. There is only so much I personally can do. And I'm NOT even the head coach, I'm an assistant coach.
Your girls are going to be as organized as you are. What I meant by a meet what sorta like a registration meeting where the parent learn the RULES like you will recive a letter/email weekly, biu weekly, monthly what ever you decide on. So they know what to expect and look for. I feel there is a serious lack of communication with the parents. IMHO. My daughter takes dance I pay for it and EXPECT the owner/teacher to communicat things to me not though my daughter. I am an involved parent. I get EVERY dance season something that says Ballet class. Required pony tail, leotard, tights, ballet shoes, Dance recital $ of costume.... If you need an example I can put something together to show you want I mean. I did cheer for 5years.
We already had the parent meeting at the first practice. They were told whats expected, how to dress, no jewlrey (girls still come in every day with earrings on) no makeup, (girls still keep coming in with fake tatoos). They were told about fundraising. They were told about concession stand. They were told were to park, (yet people STILL park where its supposed to be coaches only) They were told about the BC and all that stuff, we gave them a deadline of Aug 2 and as of Aug 20, I'm STILL after parents to get them to me. I'm very organized, and I do the best I can, but there will always be people that will drag thier feed and wait until the last second or until its almost 2 late to get me the right stuff I need. And like I said, these girls are 10. If at 10, you can't remember to give your waiting parent the paper I give them, OR the parent doesn't take the time to READ the paper I send home, that is NOT my problem. You deal with consequences.
I have 24 girls on my team. Out of 24 girls, I had 2 that didn't wear the white tshirt. SO I thought I did a good job conveying that fact that they needed one, and 22 parents took the time to read that little paper, and made sure thier daughters had white tshirts. There is only so much I personally can do. And I'm NOT even the head coach, I'm an assistant coach.
I personally think you did what I would expect as a parent of a child on the team. You are right, if the girls don't hand over hte paper or the parents don't read it there isn't anything you can do except enforce the consequences. Did the mom show up for the meeting you requested?
Missy, I think you're doing just fine. It sounds like you've handled the situation/season as well as can be expected. My husband coaches girls just a few years older than the ones you do, and I can understand your frustration. In my experience, there's always going to be one parent "like that" that doesn't want to accept any responsibility or expect their child to either. As a coach, you can only do so much. You can't hold their hands and walk a paper out to their car with each of them. You can't force a parent to write down important dates or even read the papers you send home (if they make it). There are lots of things you can't control or be held responsible for. Just remember that if you've done what you can (and it sounds like you have) that this parent's frustration/anger is more a reflection of her than it is of you.
I personally think you did what I would expect as a parent of a child on the team. You are right, if the girls don't hand over hte paper or the parents don't read it there isn't anything you can do except enforce the consequences. Did the mom show up for the meeting you requested?
Missy, I think you're doing just fine. It sounds like you've handled the situation/season as well as can be expected. My husband coaches girls just a few years older than the ones you do, and I can understand your frustration. In my experience, there's always going to be one parent "like that" that doesn't want to accept any responsibility or expect their child to either. As a coach, you can only do so much. You can't hold their hands and walk a paper out to their car with each of them. You can't force a parent to write down important dates or even read the papers you send home (if they make it). There are lots of things you can't control or be held responsible for. Just remember that if you've done what you can (and it sounds like you have) that this parent's frustration/anger is more a reflection of her than it is of you.
I personally think you did what I would expect as a parent of a child on the team. You are right, if the girls don't hand over hte paper or the parents don't read it there isn't anything you can do except enforce the consequences. Did the mom show up for the meeting you requested?
thank you ladies.
I havn't talk to the mom yet, the meeting, hopefully, is tonight at practice.
Just an aside ... If any cheerleader calls to say they can't make practice, don't worry about their excuse. Just say "Thanks for letting me know." It isn't up to us to determine if their excuse is good enough or if they can work something else out. Obviously in the case of that one cheerleader, she couldn't.
I can also empathize with the cheerleader a bit. She knows or thinks her mom is too poor to buy her a $3 white shirt. It is possible that she didn't bring her mom the note purposely because she didn't want to burden her mom any more. Who knows, maybe the mom just went off on the kid for being "selfish and always wanting new stuff" so she didn't feel like she could present her mom with the note or the need for a white shirt. Kids think and act weird sometimes. If the mom is like that with you, I'm betting she isn't very nice at home either.
My DD just signed up with cheerleading. She knows one girl on the squad who was there for the first couple of practices. While the girls were practicing, I was sitting in another area with the parents. Suddenly this girl that my DD knows walks over to her mom who is sitting near me. I can over hear their conversation (everyone could). The girl came to ask her mom to pay the registration fee. The mom was being snarky with comments about, "How much is this all going to cost me?" and "You know we just paid to register your brother for football and now this?" OMG! The registration fee is $25!!!!! (If anyone has done cheerleading, you know this is a bargain! - and uniforms are included.) The girl is near tears and saying, "I'll pay for it, Mom" and her mom was still giving her a hard time about it. I felt so bad for the girl and almost said, "F-you lady, I'll pay the d@mn registration fee." I just wanted to slap the woman. She's dragging her daughter to all the football practices and games anyway. Why make her just sit there when she could be cheering? Why is football for her son so much more important than an activity for her daughter. It still irks me to even think about it.
Anyway, there are all sorts of moms that these kids have to put up with. I agree with Melsb. Sometimes you have to smile your way through it, not take it personally, and continue on for the benefit of your child and the other children. Let the higher ups deal with whether or not she has paid her registration fee. Put out word among the parents that you could use a couple of donations of white shirts so you can have them on-hand for the girls who "forget" on game day. Keep a couple of extra rubber bands in your bag for the girls who "forget" to put up their hair (we used to not even brush their hair, just put it up in a pony and call it good.) Then keep smiling and show the kids how to not let the bullies get you down.
My DD is a high school cheerleader. She has been on a competitive team for 10 years. He coach also coaches a college squad. He sends out weekly updates to all of his squad members and copies parents who want to be included. I understand that there is a lot more information going out to her squad but I have always gotten weekly emails from her coaches. She has never been on a team where the parents weren't expected to participate. The older she gets, the more she does and the more I rely on those emails.
If she shows up with the wrong practice uniform she does not practice. If she shows up in the wrong cheer uniform or with the wrong hair style she doesn't cheer. We both have an email that states what is expected of her (and us) each practice and each game. We know where the games and competitions are for the week and the admission price. We also know what spirit items parents need to bring for competitions. I feel communication is the key to any smooth running group.
