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Hey I had a tragedy!

post #1 of 24
Thread Starter 
Ok here it is in a nutshell.

Yesterday I found out my dad had been to the hospital, dies and had been buried because my sister just happened to read the obituaries. I find out all this in about a minute and a half! A lot to take in. I am still in shock!

We had been estranged from him (my 2 sisters and I) for about 6 years. He drank heavily and had spent our entire lives doing things and making decisions that hurt us deeply.

It did not mean we DIDN"T LOVE HIM.

So we were able to find out where his "new family" buried him. Just a note. We were not listed in his obituary. His step children were listed as his children.

We will find out his cause of death today when we pick up a death certificate. I need closure.

You would have thought someone could have let us know he was ill, in the hospital, had died, and where and when the funeral was?????

We did put flowers and a card on his grave. No one can take away the fact that we are his dds and we loved him..period.

SO...I just made tuna last night!

Also I will be gone taking my dd to college Sat-Monday so I will not post cooking and menues and costs until probably Tuesday.

Thanks for listening to me ramble. My heart is broken and I am a mess.

post #2 of 24
Cricket… my deepest sympathies on your father's passing. You're right… no matter what, he was still your father and you deserved to know. I hope you can find the peace you need.
post #3 of 24
Cricket I am so sorry for your fathers death and being left out.I am in the same spot you were.My dad drinks heavily and is mean so I don't allow my kids or us to be around him so we don't get hurt.Or have to hear stuff like that.I do love him too but I don't think he sees it that way though!

You would have thought one of your relitives would have called to let you know though???

Take care and I will be saying prayers for you and your family.
post #4 of 24
I'm so sorry! What an aweful way to find something like that out. I can' t believer that they listed you in the obituary, but never even called you! Take care, and find a way to get closure.
post #5 of 24
I'm so sorry. It was unforgivable that no one called to tell you your dad was ill. Big hugs, I'm sure your dad knew you loved him, in the end that's the important thing.
post #6 of 24
So sorry for your loss, to find out like that is horrible. I cant believe it! I am sure now he is in heaven he knows your pain and feels your loss.
post #7 of 24
((((HUGS)))) Sweetie. that is awful that noone told you.
post #8 of 24
Ah Cricket how sad and what a shabby way to treat you an your sister. You are right bad behaviour on his part doesnt mean you didint love him. I hope you can find a way to have closure on this.

I wish I had the answers but hold tight to your own family and your sister

Big Hugs

post #9 of 24
I'm so sorry. Such an awful thing. I just lost my mom about 6 months ago so I undestand some of your pain. She lived a long ways away and had been very sick but they had not told us. I hope you are able to take some time to grieve your loss. So sorry you found out this way.
post #10 of 24
I'm so sorry this happened. That was so not right of his new family. Best wishes on your healing and closure.
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