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far away Grandparents

post #1 of 24
Thread Starter 
If your kids live far away from their grandparents how often do they see them. Like my parents live 2 hours away and my kids see them atleast once a month, but my dh's parents live a state over (0ver a 10 hour ride) and my kids are lucky if they see them twice a year. Right now they haven't seen them since Christmas. It just makes me mad sometimes b/c it seems that dh's parents don't seem to make the effort to see them.
post #2 of 24
My kids see my parents one long weekend a year. We live in MN and they live in FL. My mil lives in IA and they see her 3 or 4 times a year.
post #3 of 24
When my kids were small, both my parents and my inlaws lived in town and we saw them very frequently, which was great. Both sets enjoyed babysitting, having the kids over for sleepovers, taking them places etc

My parents moved out of state and it was very hard at first because we saw them so much...probably harder for me than the kids though! LOL! My kids like to email my Mom (my Dad passed away this past summer) and send her cards. She's 10 hours away by car but I fly out to see her frequently on my own. I take the kids...gosh at least 4 times a year, if not more...just depends. My Mom also comes out to see us, although not as often as we'd like!

Growing up my Dad's parents lived less than an hour from us and we really didn't see them that often. My Mom's parents lived out of state and we saw them twice a year and LOVED visiting them or having them visit and were very close to them, despite the distance.
post #4 of 24
My mom lives 4 hrs away and, sadly, unless we make the trip to see her and my stepfather, my kids would not see them other than at holidays. My mom just doesn't make the effort. It's very frustrating and hurtful to me, but I've just come to accept that she is a very limited grandparent. Even when we do go see them, they hardly interact with the kids at all. I've vowed to not be that type of grandparent!
post #5 of 24
My parents are 4 hours away and my mom can't go for more than 2 months without seeing the kids~ That has been her longest stretch, we usually see each other once a month. It is hard for her b/c in NJ we lived 10 mins away and the kids practically lived with them they were there so much.

My in-laws still live in NJ but we see them once or twice a year when they visit us. They are looking at moving closer to us next year and we can't wait!
post #6 of 24
We have never lived near my parents. When the kids were born, we were 6 hours away, we moved a bit further so 7 hours away and then they retired and now 9 hours away. We see them a lot. We go visit, they come visit, we e-mail, we talk on the phone a lot. I don't think my children are missing out on anything. Most of their friends are in the same boat since we are in a military town. Most people do not have family nearby.

My inlaws used to be 10 hours away, then 12 hours away and now 30 minutes away. (They moved closer.) We see them more often, but, obviously, shorter visits, which works out better for us. My children are not any closer to them because they are closer. In fact, our children prefer my parents just because they are more the traditional grandparent types than my inlaws. My inlaws, I am discovering, sort of scare my children. I have only recently discovered this and do not know what to do to make it better.

Growing up, we lived across the country from our family for a good portion. (We lived in Los Angeles and my grandparents lived in Florida and Tennessee so we were really far, but we were very close with them, too.)

So, moral to my story: Distance is not that big of a deal if you are good at keeping in contact with the grandparents.
post #7 of 24
I agree with Claire, once again! lol
DH and I don't have children, but when we do, theoretically, they will be "close" to both sets of grandparents, as both of our parents live within 1/2 mile of each other, at 15 miles from us! So, getting to actually visit them won't be a problem!

As far as our grandparents are concerned, I grew up in neighboring towns to both my mom's and my dad's parents. However, I wasn't and still am not close to dad's mom (his dad died in '95). She never kept us over night, never babysat us for more than a 3 hour time span (at last resort), and so even though she lives a whopping 10 minutes from me (used to be 4 minutes), I only see her on birthdays or holidays or less. WE aren't close to her whatsoever. My mom's parents are the complete opposite. We stayed just about every single weekend with them growing up, they loved having us there!!! We are extremely close to both (even though my grandma passed away just over a year ago) of them. My grandpa only lives 15 minutes from us, and even though I should see him more than I do, we are very close!

DH's grandparents live 12 hours away each set. One lives across the state (Texas..) and the other set lives in Kansas. He is closer to both sets than I am to my dad's mom. They are all good people, and we do love them! I wish for his (and our future kids') sake that they lived closer, but that's us excuses to The older they get, the more we see them, just because you never know when it will be their last day.

So, along with claire, moral is, doesn't matter how close you live to your (or your kids) grandparents, its the amount of effort that counts.
post #8 of 24
My Mom lives accross the street from us, but my ILS live 2 hours away. We make one trip in the spring and one in the fall. if they want to see them more than that they have to come see us. My MIL gets very mad and says we need to see tham at least once a month...but they are not wanting to do the driving. OH WELL
post #9 of 24
My MIL passed away before my kids were born and my deadbeat FIL lives in Florida (us in PA). Last time he was up (for his own mother's funeral) we had to call 911 because he was having a reaction to alcohol withdrawal (which my eldest dd witnessed), so needless to say, it's just my parents and they are 2 hrs. away so we try to see them once a month, taking turns going up or down to their house or ours. I am actually taking the girls to see them this weekend since dh has to work but then I'll be making another trip down in a few weeks as my SIL is having her 2nd baby on Oct. 23 and they live up the road from my parents.
post #10 of 24
ok my inlaws live only 30 min away and we seem them usually once a week sometimes every other week.... my dad lives also 30 min away and he sees my kids maybe 3 or 4 times a year if that. so i can totally see how when you are in different states it can be harder heck my dad lives near us and he does not make any effort and i gave up going there...
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