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Scared to fly - what to do????

post #1 of 16
Thread Starter 
I am so freaked out to fly next month. How do you overcome fear of something like this? Yes, I know I was in much higher danger driving on the interstate in the rain tonight, but at least I feel like I am in control. I have to take my babies on a plane that someone I don't know is flying. And we have to change planes, so a total of 4 planes. I wouldn't be so freaked out if DH was going to, because then if we all go - at least we are all together. The only alternative is letting the kids go with my parents, and I don't want to do that either. How do I get over the fear???
post #2 of 16
I have different fears, and one thing my dad told me, that just made sense to me, he said " hun, if its our time to go, its our time to go, we can be sitting here being fearful of a plane crashing, and walk outside our home and get hit by a car" and everytime I am fearful of something, I remember what he said, because its true. We can't control bad things happening, we can however control to not let fear get the best of us.
We can't control what is going to happen, but we CAN live life, and stop being so scared, because fear takes so much energy from you, and in the mean time, your missing all the enjoyment, because your life is filled with fear.

I would say, get on that plane, look at your precious babies, and enjoy life.

I do know your feelings, I feel with having kids, we're more fearful because its not just us in this, its our babies, but they wouldn't want you to be scared.

I sometimes wished I could be a child again, only for their free spirit, and fearlessness.
post #3 of 16
I'm afraid of flyong anymore, also. My dh wants me to go overseas to a family wedding in December. I don't thnk I'm going to be able to get on that plane! it may make sense to say "when it's your time, it's your time", but i don't want my time to come in an airplane.
post #4 of 16
Oh boy can I relate. We're all flying cross country this weekend. I didnt have a problem with it until all that stuff happened overseas recently, since then my stomach has been in knots. My mom says the same thing about being your time. Although its true, it doesnt make it any easier if youre a worrier. And I feel the same as you - at least we're all together - plus my mom and her best friend and husband are all on the same flights as us. It is very draining to be worried and live in fear - believe me, I know.
post #5 of 16
Go to your Dr. and get a prescription for Zanax or something like that that you can take for your anxiety. It wouldn't be something you would need to take every day, just the morning of your flight to help calm your nerves.
post #6 of 16
I have tickets to fly home in November. Shortly after I booked this trip I saw some "activity" going on in both the Texas and OKlahoma City's airports ~ Both of which I would be using during my travels.

There have been a few instances here and there too which make the small print in the news papers that have gotten me really freaked out. I am travelling alone this trip so I told DH is things continue I won't be going home. I happen to be flying during the busiest time of the year (Thanksgiving) so to me that makes airlines major targets ~ something I shoudl have thought about BEFORE booking my flight!
post #7 of 16
As the wife of a Pilot, with many of our friends flying for the Airlines, in response to not knowing who is flying, I empathise with you. All I can say is that they have such much training, and it is constant - that they should be able to handle anything.
Now, the irony to all of this, is that I am afraid of flying!!!! The only thing that has helped me get over it, is when my dh can sit next to me on the plane and can explain all the little bumps. Realise that when the plane lurches, it is not the Pilot. When they are landing, if it is windy, it is not the pilot. Most of the pilots are very competant.
With the babies, how old and how many? Don't be afraid that if you have not bought seats for them, to go up to the checkin counter and ask if there are any seats available for a car seat, or an extra child, some airlines have proper seat harnesses for children, you just have to ask.
Also make sure that the children are either chewing gum, have a paci, or are drinking a bottle on take off and landing.
I hope that you are able to cope with the flights, and I know how you feel. Been there, done that!!!
Have a safe trip.
post #8 of 16
Originally Posted by golfermom View Post

it may make sense to say "when it's your time, it's your time", but i don't want my time to come in an airplane.

post #9 of 16
I am a flight attendant, and I can get on a plane just fine. BUT, put my babies on with me and I am a wreck!

Pilots undergo very extensive training. They are grounded for the littlest of medical conditions. They undergo training, check flights, etc all the time.

My DH read you need to fly EVERY day for over a million years or something like that to be killed in a plane crash.

I've had some scary moments, yes. But I am here, and if my job called me back (laid off right now) I'd go.

My BF got a prescription, the dr. gave her like dozen pills for flying. Her son has special needs, she is not a good flyer, and traveling is difficult. Her son needs the same constant routine, so coming cross country is a nightmare for her. Ask your doctor.

And don't be afraid to ask the crew for help, or another lady. I don't know how old, or how many you will travel with. But people are willing to help. We had a lady alone with 9 month old triplets once! Talk about brave! Good luck! PM me if you have any questions about flying w/ the kiddies, I am glad to help!
post #10 of 16
Well, I have always been afriad of flying (pre and post 9/11 - it is not associated with that act) and for those with that fear, it is just like other fears - they don't make sense and I probably need therapy to get over it. BUT, I don't fly that often nor do I have free time and money to go to therapy. You can tell somebody with a fear that if it is our time to go whether it be on a plane, on a tall building, with a snake, with a balloon, whatever, it's their time to go, but that doesn't address the FEAR. If they have a fear of that activity or object, it is irrational. I know my fear is irrational, but it is still a fear.

I just do it. I cry the entire time, I pray the entire time, I am sure I make everybody nervous, but if I want to go somewhere bad enough, I just do it. Honestly, I also take Tylenol PM (at my doctor's suggestion) to sort of "take the edge off". It usually knocks me out, but not when I am on a plane. Prayer seems to be the only thing that really works for me.

Also, I usually let the flight attendant know (and my seat partners if there is one) just so they are aware. I am not loud or anything, but I just hate to fly. The sensation really freaks me out! Most people are very, very nice about it. I remember one man when I was in college holding my hand telling me about his children and asking about my family when we were taking off to get my mind off of it. I know it sounds odd, but he was really nice and trying to help me. He told me everybody is afraid of it, they just don't admit it. This was in 1992 - well before September 11th. He was the right person in the right spot at the right time for me that day.
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