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Hip Mom Rule
#6: Be Interesting ©
Heidi A. Burns
I had had one of
those weeks where it seemed like every time I turned
around, I ran into a pile of dirty clothes, stepped
in a pile of crumbs, tripped over a pile of toys . .
. piles, piles, piles. And to make it more
aggravating, my youngest was trying to walk and
couldn't quite figure it out, so he was attached to
the backs of my jeans using me as a giant walker.
The oldest was bored of the rain, bored of his toys,
bored of his brother not being able to walk. In
short, I needed a night out.
I called my friend, also a hip mother of young
children. I said, "This week has absolutely kicked
my butt. I need to get out. Are you in?" Of course!
What mom isn't ready to ditch the family life for a
night out with a friend sans children? I was REALLY
looking forward to this; I really needed it. We met
at a hip coffee shop with low lighting and
comfortable couches. I wore a hip outfit that melded
with the fun atmosphere of the coffee shop. I fixed
my hair and make up. I anticipated great
conversation, new ideas, and a break from the
routine of daily mothering.
Instead, we talked about kids, or rather she talked
about her kids. The entire time. I kept trying to
divert the conversation to the news, religion,
taxes, fashion, celebrity gossip, anything that
didn't directly involve poop, spit-up, or potty
training. The night was a colossal failure. I
returned home from my big night out more enervated
than I was when I left my house.
Now don't get me wrong -- I love to talk about my
kids as much as the next parent, but I crave
conversations that don't always revolve around the
kids. I crave adult conversation. To get that, I
need to have something interesting to talk about.
So, I read the paper on Sundays, I belong to a book
club and read at least one book a month, I watch a
couple minutes of the news each day or listen to NPR
on the radio. You don't have to be an intellectual
to be interesting; you don't have to devote much
time (because, seriously, as a new mom, wouldn't you
rather take a nap?), but do enough so that if you
happen upon another person craving conversation
involving more than diapers and sleeping routines,
you can contribute in some small meaningful way.
In short, it can be hip to chat up your little
cherubs. It's fun to share the trials and
tribulations of motherhood. But it's the hip mom way
to have other things to talk about, too, especially
if your big night out is with a friend who has her
own little cherubs waiting for her at home.
About the Author: Heidi
Burns is a freelance writer, editor, and
adjunct faculty member. She earned an M.A.
from Iowa State University in 2002 and has
since married, lived in three states, had
two children, and adjuncted for four
different colleges. Free time is elusive to
her, but if she ever did find a spare
moment, she would most likely take a long,
uninterrupted nap. For more information and
details, please
contact
Heidi A. Burns.
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