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10 Tips for
Parents Who Don't Get Out Much Without the Kids
By Jen Singer
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Chuck E Cheese's tokens
are not a valid form of currency
(except, of course, at Chuck E
Cheese's).
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That's not a design on
your shirt. It's Gerber's strained peas.
Scrape it off before you go out.
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Two minutes after you
left your kids with the sitter, your
toddler stopped wailing in the doorway
and started playing contentedly with an
empty paper towel tube.
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That store with beds in
it is a mattress shop, not a nap center
for parents who had the 2, 4 and 5:30
a.m. feedings last night.
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"Five-star" restaurants
aren't theme restaurants for budding
astronomers. They're the ones without
crayons at the table, chicken fingers on
the menu or changing tables in the
restrooms.
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A cocktail party is
essentially a playgroup for grown-ups
with booze. (Note: Sharing is frowned
upon).
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They don't sell glow
sticks at the opera.
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Your suitcase is the
dusty one with the tags from your
honeymoon flight still on it. (The one
without Power Puff Girls on it).
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Getting the flu while on
vacation should be a disappointment, not
a welcome opportunity to finally rest
peacefully without having to create the
cast of "Dragon Tales" in Play-Doh
between sneezes.
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Yes, eventually, you have
to go home.
©Jen
Singer of Mommasaid.net
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