“I’m going to be so bored,” my best
friend admitted. We were sitting in her son’s nursery
while my daughter slept in her infant carseat. The only
thing missing was her baby. He hadn’t been born yet.
My friend had worked all her life.
She and I had been college roommates. We bascially grew
up together and became the women we were now, sitting in
her son’s room by his crib. She lifted her highly
pregnant self and went downstairs to make tea.
“What am I going to do all day?” I
heard her say as she tiptoed to the kitchen. Being a
SAHM, I smiled to myself as I followed her down the
stairs. We talked about my life, how most days flew by
and yet some seemed to linger forever before night fell.
I watched my friend’s eyes as they darted this way and
that. I could see she did not understand a word I was
saying. How could she? Her impending motherhood would
teach her well.
Four months later. We were in a
coffee shop. My best friend’s eyes were red and swollen.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she cursed
under her breath. I stirred my chai, shifting my
pregnant self in the chair. What could I say to her? She
seemed distraught.
“I’ll be going back to work next
week. Where did the time go? I had no idea I would spend
so much time getting nothing done!” she wailed into her
cappuccino. “I mean, I had plans. Big plans. I was going
to crochet an entire baby blanket, paint the hallway,
and carpet the bedroom. It didn’t seem like a lot. Heck!
When I was single, that would have been a weekend
project!” I kept stirring my tea, wondering what words
of wisdom I could impart to my friend. Her eyes welled
up as she admitted she didn’t think leaving her son to
return to work would be as hard as it felt now. She felt
miserable and couldn’t bear to leave him with someone
else.
The next week I called her every
night to see how she was feeling. After a few months,
she settled into a nice routine and felt working
part-time was okay. There were hard days, but for the
most part, she felt fine about the balance she had found
with work and family life.
We would often meet on her days off.
She loved the days when she was home with her son.
Picking at the carpet with her finger one day, she
looked at me with envy.
“You seem to have it all. A writing
career and you stay home with your kids! I wish I had
what you have.” I thought about the untidy household I
ran, the half-eaten honey toast sitting on my desk, and
the sheets that needed to be washed. I had been feeling
a bit disheveled lately. Good things were happening
writing-wise, but my house seemed to have fallen apart
because of my neglect. I pondered what she had said for
a moment.
“The grass is always greener, eh?” I
winked at my friend who seemed lost in thought. Her
nails sparkled in the sunlight. She had a son and still
had time for a manicure. I wondered how she did
it. Just then, a fax came through her machine. My friend
glanced over the paperwork and apologized that she had
some work to do for the office. I politely said my
good-byes as my friend picked up the phone to dial a
client’s number. Lingering in the doorway, I watched my
friend’s back tense as she flipped through some papers
on her desk. Maybe office life wasn’t all it was cracked
up to be. She never seemed to be away from the office,
even when she was at home. I silently closed the front
door.
A few weeks later she told me she was
pregnant with her second little boy. We hugged each
other tight, thrilled that we would be having our second
babies within the same year.
Eight months later. My infant son
slept upstairs and my daughter was at her morning
preschool. The phone rang.
“I’ve decided it,” I heard my best
friend’s determined voice say on the other end. “I’m not
returning to work when Lucas is born in October. That’s
it. I’ve had it with the overtime, the panythose and the
late-night meetings. I’m going to be a SAHM, just like
you!”
I smiled. I wondered if she was aware
that her overtime had just begun. That her “late-night
meetings” would resume when her second baby was born. It
didn’t matter, though. She had listened to her heart.
Her heart had won. For a moment, I could have sworn I
could hear her grin ten miles away.